


Dear Virgil

by PrinceofDespair



Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series), Thomas Sanders, Video Blogging RPF
Genre: Fluff, Gen, Light Angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-14
Updated: 2018-03-14
Packaged: 2019-03-31 04:06:34
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,685
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13966986
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PrinceofDespair/pseuds/PrinceofDespair
Summary: After a particularly heated argument, Virgil has isolated himself in his room. Roman makes it his mission to coax him back out.





	Dear Virgil

**Author's Note:**

> **Warnings:** Arguing, food mention, mild swearing. (This fic is basically fluff with a little bit of angst).
> 
> **A/N:** When I'm in a bad headspace (as I have been for the past few days) I like to just zone out and listen to music. The Cure, The Smiths, Depeche Mode, stuff like that is what I usually play on repeat until I start to feel better. That's basically where this idea came from: a bad day mixed with a whole lot of new wave. 
> 
> This is basically free form by the way. I wrote it all in one session so it’s probably not as good as my other work but I hope you guys still enjoy it!
> 
> Anyway, the song featured in this story is Dear Prudence, by The Beatles. However, I _highly_ recommend you guys listen to the [Siouxsie and the Banshees](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qBbNVjQwTbs) cover of this song instead. It's the version that inspired this little drabble (and besides, Virgil is _totally_ a Siouxise Sioux fan).

It had been ten days since _The Incident_.

Contrary to what Roman had believed at the time, Thomas' life did in fact go on. There were plenty of meetings to attend, videos to film, songs to write and record; they were just as busy as ever. As Logan had assured them, one missed opportunity wasn't necessarily the end of the world. If anything, the only significant change _The Incident_ had brought on was the uncomfortable stillness that had settled over the mindscape. It was too quiet now, too empty...

Though, again, Logan had promised that this too would pass with enough time. All they could do now was be patient.

It wasn't too bad (at least, that was what Roman was trying to convince himself), there was so much work to do that this new stillness was fairly easy to ignore. Roman was currently focused on today’s distraction, one that Logan had been so kind as to share with him; planning out the scheduling for next week's project.

He sat with his legs criss crossed on the couch next to the logical Side, trying his best to give him his full attention as Logan went on and on. Attempting to work around the issue with their friends' conflicting schedules, debating on filming locations, staring across the room at the purple door that had yet to open since-

“Roman? Did you hear me?”

“Wha...oh.”

Roman let his eyes fall from the door and back onto Logan who was watching him with a slight frown on his face, one more of concern than annoyance.

“Sorry, Logan,” he says, running a hand through his hair. “I guess I just...zoned out for a moment. What were you saying?”

Logan doesn't respond right away. Instead, he glances behind him at the door Roman had previously been focusing on, then he turns back with a sigh. He opens his mouth, then shuts it again, brows furrowed in thought as if he was silently debating with himself. It was undoubtedly the same argument he had spent the better part of a week trying to convince the other two Sides of accepting.

Patience. Just be patient.

“I asked whether we should schedule the haircut for Monday or Tuesday,” he finally says, deciding it was better to ignore the elephant in the room entirely.

Roman just nods. “Right. Well, both days are already rather busy...”

Logan doesn't waste any time diving right back into the work after that, and Roman manages to not let his eyes drift back over to the purple door across the room.

Thankfully, after a while, the solemn mood that had fallen over the two of them had somewhat lifted as they fell back into their usual routine _(“No, Roman, we absolutely will not make time to go clubbing this week.” “Aw, come on, nerd. Loosen up!”)_. Before long they had the beginnings of an efficient schedule, one that was sure to keep Thomas productive throughout the week but (thanks to Roman's persistence) with a little extra time for play squeezed in here and there as well. 

They barely take any notice when Patton walks out from the kitchen and into the commons a few hours later, both Sides thoroughly focused on the work in front to them to pay him much mind.

“Um...hey guys?”

Roman and Logan both looked up at the moral Side standing in front of them, smiling as he wrung a dish towel between his hands, almost nervously. Roman wondered if Logan had also noticed that his smile wasn't quite reaching his eyes.

“Dinner's ready,” Patton tells them simply.

If Logan had noticed, he didn't feel the need to comment on it. Instead he replies, “Thank you, Patton. We'll join you in a moment.”

Roman only gives Patton a smile and, to his relief, it's returned a little more genuinely than before. 

“Okay...just don't take too long. It'll get cold.”

Logan nods and then goes back to his notes; immediately picking up his pen to quickly cross things out, add things back in and then frown as he crosses them back out again. His nose is buried so deep in his work that he doesn't see Patton's gaze shift over to that purple door across the other side of the commons. The purple door painted with a dark storm cloud and a lightening bolt. The purple door that, from the other side, had remained completely silent since _The Incident_.

Roman, however, absolutely does notice this. 

He watches as Patton's hands grip the towel tighter while he bites down on his lower lip, obviously conflicted. Slowly he looks back over to Logan, then the door and finally, meets Roman's gaze. 

A silent question hangs in there air between them.

Patience. Logan had told them over and over again, during the many times this subject had come up over the past week, to leave it alone and the situation would work itself out but...

It had been ten days since _The Incident_. Ten days, and Virgil had yet to come out of his room.

Slowly, still completely unnoticed by the logical Side, Roman gestures towards the door with a tilt of his head. 

Patton, instantly looking more determined, quickly strides across the commons until he's right up to Virgil's door. Logan is finally brought out of his concentration by Patton's movements; he looks up from his notes and then turns around to watch as Patton gently raps his knuckles across the door.

Logan slowly looks back over at Roman and shoots him a disappointed glare, knowing right away that he was an accomplice in Patton's current quest.

Roman only shrugs back at him, a hint of a smirk on his face.

“Virgil, buddy?” Patton calls in a heartbreakingly hopeful voice. “Dinner's ready, come on out.” Then, after a brief moment of hesitation he adds an almost inaudible, “...please, kiddo?”

Logan lets out a sigh and then firmly says, “Patton.”

“I made breakfast for dinner!” Patton goes on, ignoring Logan entirely. “I know how much you like that!”

“Patton.”

“There's chocolate chip pancakes and bacon and-”

_“Patton.”_

Patton finally spins around and actually shouts, _“What, Logan?!”_

Roman flinches back. He had only heard Patton raise his voice like that a handful of times throughout Thomas' life and it was always...upsetting. 

Logan, however, doesn't seem fazed as he crosses his arms and says, “Was that response really necessary?”

Patton takes a second to compose himself, but the determined frown doesn't leave his face. “I didn't mean to...” he trails off and then shakes his head and sighs, frustrated. “No. No, there's no excuse. I shouldn't have yelled at you, Logan. I'm sorry.”

“It's quite alright,” Logan says. “I realize your emotions have been running higher than usual since-”

“But I need you to understand that I can't keep ignoring him like this!”

Roman scoots farther away from Logan as Patton glares him down, as if this would somehow save him from being placed in the middle of what was shaping out to be another fight. The last few days had actually been relatively peaceful, with Patton finally agreeing to at least _try_ and see where Logan was coming from. This wasn't the first time that Virgil had retreated into his room after getting upset over something; Logan had been insistent that there wasn't anything to worry about.

Though...Virgil usually only kept to himself for a day or two, not an entire week.

“Patton, how many times do we need to go over this?” Logan asks, clearly exasperated. “If Virgil wants space, we should respect his wishes and give it to him.”

“Ten days, Logan!” Patton practically pleads as he stomps towards him. “He hasn't even come out to eat! We can't just-”

Logan is quick to interrupt him as he stands up to meet him halfway, saying, “You know we don't actually need to eat to survive, Patton. Considering that the four of us are merely projections of Thomas'-”

“That's not the point and you know it!” Patton snaps back.

Roman finally gets up and hurries over to place himself between the two of them. “Okay, this has gone on long enough,” he says, stretching his arms out as if to keep them apart. “You're _both_ being childish.”

Patton and Logan turn their attention over to him. They both had pouting frowns on their faces, only further proving his previous statement. 

“But, Roman! Don't you think-”

“Excuse me, I have been fairly reasonable in all of this-”

Roman cuts them both off as he gestures towards the door and says, “You know Virgil can totally hear you two, right?”

There's a silence that follows as his words sink in, the anger and annoyance instantly starting to fade from the two older Sides. Bickering at each other wasn't going to coax Virgil out anytime soon. It wouldn't be a surprised if the anxious Side was working himself up even more over all of this as they spoke.

Patton, suddenly looking as if he was on the verge of tears, turns to the door and says, “Oh...oh no. I...Virgil, I didn't...”

Logan sighs and places a hand on his shoulder. Patton sniffles and looks up at him, his eyes watering. 

“Patton, why don't we move this discussion into the kitchen,” Logan suggests. 

Patton nods and then wipes at his eyes before any tears could fall. Without another word, Logan gently ushers Patton down the hall and into the kitchen, Roman watching them go before he turns his attention back to Virgil's door.

He had always tried to stay out of Patton and Logan's arguing, only mediating if he had too. Maybe they should just leave Virgil alone to sort himself out, no matter how long it takes. Or perhaps they should have started pushing the moment he slammed that door and locked it from the other side. 

Considering this was all Roman's fault, he didn't feel like he deserved to have a say in this either way...but he couldn't help but lean more towards Patton side.

Without thinking, Roman walks over to Virgil's door. He stares at it for a moment and then leans forward and places his ear against it.

Silence, as had unfortunately become the norm during these past days. 

He sighs and turns around to lean back against it. He could just barely make out bits and pieces of the conversation Patton and Logan were having in the kitchen. Thankfully no longer raising their voices but still rehashing the same argument; to push or not to push.

“Hey, Verge?” he finds himself asking out loud into the empty room. “It's...it's Roman. I know you can hear me.”

Roman was actually starting to doubt that Virgil could in fact hear all of them. It was just so quiet, not a grunt of annoyance or sigh of frustration came from the other side.

“Look...I know you're upset, but this has gone on long enough, yes? Could you at least have dinner with us? Just for tonight?”

No response. Of course there wasn't.

With a huff, Roman lets himself slide down onto the floor, his head falling back to lightly bump against it.

“You're a pain in the ass,” he says, half expecting a curse back in return. 

A minute passes and he gets none.

He draws one knee up and lets his hand rest against it, the other stretched out in front of him. He closes his eyes and for brief moment, debates with himself. The words were right there, dancing on the tip of his tongue, and he knows deep down that he should say them but...would Virgil even care? Had he waited too long?

At this point, it didn't really matter either way. The worst that could happen was Virgil would continue to hide.

“I'm sorry,” Roman tells him quietly and then, with some reluctance adds, “...you were right.”

Maybe it was just his wild imagination, but Roman could swear he heard the faintest creak coming from behind the door. As if someone had shifted ever so slightly on a bed.

He had tried to put it all out of his mind, wanting to just forgot that the entire ordeal ever happened. What was done was done, as Logic had said, there was no point dwelling on it anymore. Though, as much as it actually pained him to admit it, Roman knew he couldn't keep denying it anymore. He had messed up and it was high time he tried to make amends for...

* * *

_The Incident_.

Roman had been absolutely ecstatic for the past two weeks. Finally! It had been so long since they had the opportunity to preform on stage. Having an audience of millions was nice, of course, but it just wasn't the same watching the feedback roll in from behind a computer screen. Being able to see an audience right in front of them, watching their faces light up as they danced across a stage, captivating them with their voice...the feeling was exhilarating and Roman had missed it terribly. 

Of course, they still had to get past the audition first.

For once it was actually Roman who had insisted that Thomas get to the theater early, so there he was; sitting in the parking lot at 2:30 in the afternoon as he waited nervously to go inside for the audition that started at three. Roman had been trying his hardest to convince Thomas to start practicing his song one last time but he had been, unfortunately, preoccupied with another matter.

“We shouldn't be here,” said Virgil for what could have quite possibly been the hundredth time that week. “I'm telling you, this is a mistake.”

“Would you please stay calm for once?” Roman had groaned back, completely fed up with the anxious mess standing before him.

“Staying calm isn't the problem, Princey. You know damn well that even if Thomas somehow manages to land this, which I'm telling you, he won't,-”

Roman had rolled his eyes so hard at that moment, he swore he had seen the back of his own head.

“-we don't have the time to spare on this show! We barely had time to rehearse for this one audition!” Virgil had finished. Despite his laid back stance, with his arms crossed as he leaned against the wall of the commons, it was obvious that the stress was weighing down on him heavy.

“Then we'll make time!” Roman had snapped. “I'm sure there are few things we could push back in his schedule-”

“Logan told you before that there wasn't! For once, would you just pull your head out of your ass and listen to me?!”

“Um, _excuse me?!_ ”

Thomas had been trying his hardest to ignore their bickering as he gripped the steering wheel tight. The two them were so loud that it had become extremely difficult to hear Logan and Patton's side, though he could still feel them faintly, if he really focused.

“Virgil has a point, Thomas. Taking this role would mean significantly less time spent on creating content for your channel. You've been at fairly steady subscriber growth as of late, this would almost certainly have a negative effect on that.”

“Performing again would be really fun! I miss it too! But...you can't spread yourself too thin, kiddo. Maybe we should wait...”

Deep down, Thomas knew he wasn't ready for this. Roman had him convinced that he didn't actually need that much practice before the audition _(“We'll be fine! How could they not love us?”)_ , that it didn't matter if there wasn't any time for this now; once he was cast everything would somehow just fall into place. His desires were so strong that he could barely hear his common sense telling him otherwise but...

Virgil was getting louder with every minute. It was practically impossible to ignore him.

Roman had taken a deep breath in and out, determined to not entertain Virgil anymore. They were doing this. Thomas was going to get on stage, sing his heart out, get cast and then...hell, they were already halfway to Broadway!

“We're on in ten,” he said, not bothering to meet Virgil's eyes. “He has just enough time to practice one song so, if you don't mind.” He waved his hand, as if dismissing the anxious Side. “I've got this.”

Virgil had sighed and shook his head, but he didn't say another word.

Finally, Roman put all his energy into sending out his thought to Thomas, feeling his chest swell in excitement as he prepared to sing with him and...

Thomas didn't make a move other than to nervously look at the clock.

“Virgil,” Roman said almost numbly as what was happening immediately started to sink in. “Virgil, let him go.”

“...no.”

Roman could actually feel tears sting his eyes as he was suddenly filled with rage. “Virgil, don't do this to me! Let me take over!”

“I...I can't,” Virgil said, his voice soft and sympathetic. “Roman, I'm not letting you do this, man. Thomas can't handle it right now.”

“Virgil, please!” Roman had begged, but Virgil only shook his head.

**“No.”**

With a heavy sigh, Thomas put his key back into the ignition and started the car. Someday, he would have the time again to preform in a show. Just...not right now.

Roman had heard Patton and Logan hurrying over to them but his eyes were fixed on Virgil. As the tears finally started to fall, Virgil looked away from him, his own eyes filled with guilt despite of himself.

“Are you happy now? Is this what you wanted? To see me defeated?!” Roman had actually laughed then, but it was bitter and filled with contempt. “Well, congratulations, you won. You broke me.”

Virgil sighed but still refused to meet his gaze. “Princey, come on. You know it's not like that. You're being-”

“Maybe I was wrong about you.”

Roman ignored the hand on his shoulder; probably Patton's, but he was too far gone to notice. 

Virgil finally looked up at him, eyes wide. “What..?”

“I thought...I really thought you actually made us better. But I was wrong.” 

Roman pushed the hand off his shoulder and got closer to Virgil, completely standing in his space until their noses were practically touching.

“You ruin everything,” he said with as much poison as he could muster. It must have been effective because Virgil instantly shrunk back at his words. 

“Roman, please, I-”

“Go to hell, Anxiety.”

With that, Roman had spun around, pushed past the other two Sides that had apparently been standing behind him and then stormed off into his room.

* * *

Roman winces as he recalls that disastrous day. After taking a few hours to cool off (and after being thoroughly scolded by Patton) Roman had eventually come to his senses and realized how incredibly foolish he had been. While a part of him still disagreed with Virgil's decision...he should have never said those hurtful things to him. He was hoping that Virgil would have just shrugged off his insults and everything would be fine, but things didn't tend to be that simple with him. Virgil took everything to heart, it was no wonder he was still this upset.

Roman had swore that the moment that Virgil stepped out of his room, he would be right there to apologize. A day had gone by, then two and now here they were ten days later. There was still no sign that he would be coming out anytime soon.

Roman could only hope that his words would be enough to draw his favorite emo nightmare out of hiding.

“Look,” he starts as he opens his eyes to stare up at the ceiling. “You know I'm no good at this sort of thing, but I...I need you to know how sorry I am, Virgil. That was entirely uncalled for, I was just trying to hurt you back and...that was unfair. I apologize.” 

Roman sighs as he runs a hand through his hair and ruffles it up. “What do I have to say to get you to come back?” he asks more to himself than to the silent being behind the door. 

He raises his hands in the air suddenly and calls out, “Alright, fine! I'll admit it! I...I miss you, okay? I miss our stupid banters and I miss your obnoxious PG-13 music and I miss your sulking and...”

Roman lets his arms fall in defeat and harmlessly taps his head back against the door.

“...it's boring without you here,” he says softly.

There would be more auditions, hopefully ones they could actually find the time to attend. Thomas had plenty of other things to keep him busy until then, things that Roman could play his own part in. Now, all Roman really wanted was their little worrier back.

Roman glances down the hall where he sees Logan walking out of the kitchen, alone. He pauses, taking in Roman's position on the floor, and frowns. 

“Are you alright?” he asks.

“Yeah, don't mind me,” Roman replies, giving him a thumbs up.

Logan doesn't look too convinced but he nods. “Patton asked for a moment to himself before the three-” 

He catches himself and shakes his head. “Before the _two_ of us join him.”

Roman gives him a small smile and nods. Logan did a fantastic job of hiding any hint of feelings he may have, but even he would slip up from time to time. He missed Virgil just as much as the rest of them, despite his insistence that they all leave him alone. 

The logical Side heads back over to the couch and dives right back into his work. Though, if Roman watched him close enough, it was obvious he wasn't as focused now as he was before. 

Roman closes his eyes again...and begins to brainstorm. Virgil was stubborn, it was likely that it would take more than an apology to draw him back to them. If he had actually heard all of what Roman had said, there was chance that the anxious Side had still managed to convince himself that it wasn't true; that Roman hadn't actually meant any of it and he was only apologizing because he was afraid Virgil would try to abandon Thomas again.

Roman starts to hum quietly to himself, as he usually does when he's thinking. He knew Virgil was still in there, he had to be. After all, Thomas was still functioning the same way he always did. Virgil wouldn't leave them to fend for themselves, he cared about them all too much to put them through that. However, nothing was stopping him from just locking his door and throwing away the key...a terrifying thought that Roman desperately hoped hadn't already happened.

He hums a little louder now, wondering if Virgil could still hear him. Maybe he could annoying him back out. Belt the Disney songs Roman knew he hated the most as loud as he possibly could, until Virgil finally got fed up and came storming out of his room. He would take the threat of getting his ass kicked at this point, anything to get-

Roman suddenly gasps loud enough for Logan to hear. The logical Side glances over at him with a raised eyebrow but then silently goes back to his work.

The idea that had suddenly popped into his head was admittedly silly, it probably wouldn't even work but...maybe...

With some hesitation, Roman begins to sing. 

_“Dear Virgil...”_

Logan, once again, looks up from his notes to stare at him with a now utterly confused expression. Roman flashes him a smile as he goes on.

_“Won't you come out to play?”_

There was no mistaking it now, Roman totally just heard a couple of creaks coming from the other side of the door; quiet enough that Logan couldn't possibly hear them, but they were definitely there.

_“Dear Virgil, greet the brand new day...”_

He starts to sing more confidently now, letting his eyes fall close as the song flows out of him. 

_“The sun is up, the sky is blue. It's beautiful and so are you, dear Virgil...”_

Roman cracks an eye open as he hears footsteps coming from across the hall. Patton had come out to stand in the doorway of the kitchen, cocking his head to the side quizzically as he watched him. 

_“Won't you come out to play?”_

Patton walks over to Roman, just as he was finishing the first verse. Leaning over him, he presses his ear to the door and then...

He covers his mouth to hide his gasp as the two of them finally hear shuffling, then the soft pats of feet against carpet. Suddenly, there's a quiet thud against the door.

Roman can't help but grin as he hears something heavy slide down against the other side.

Patton turns around and beams at Logan who was staring at the two of them in utter disbelief. 

_“Dear Virgil, open up your eyes,”_ Roman goes on, practically feeling Virgil's warmth from the other side as they were back to back.

_“Dear Virgil,”_ Patton sings, picking up from where Roman left off as he bends down to join him on the floor. _“See the sunny skies.”_

Together, the two of them sing, _“The wind is low, the birds will sing, that you are part of everything. Dear Virgil, won't you open up your eyes?”_

As Roman starts to open his mouth to go on, Patton suddenly shakes his head back and forth wildly, stopping him. Before Roman could ask what was wrong, Patton points over to Logan and then gestures him over. 

Logan looks between the two of them for one questioning moment. Then, with a quiet chuckle, he sets his notes back down on the table and stands up. Patton claps his hands and practically vibrates next to Roman as Logan walks over to them. He leans against the door and then, with a bit of hesitation, sings the next line.

_“Dear Virgil, let me see you smile.”_

Logan rolls his eyes as a snort is heard from behind the door, but he goes on as Patton starts frantically gesturing for them to continue. 

_“Dear Virgil,”_ the three of them sing together, _“Like a little child...the-”_

_“The clouds will be a daisy chain...”_

Patton actually lets out a squeal as, for the first time in ten days, Virgil's husky voice sounds from his room. Roman feels himself start to tear up, but he manages to swallow it down as, together, the four of them finish the song.

_“...so let me see you smile again. Dear Virgil...won't you let me see you smile?”_

After they finish, there's a moment of silence that falls over the three of them as they patiently wait. Then, finally, after some more shuffling the door unlocks with a quiet click.

Virgil opens the door just a crack as Patton and Roman lean back to give him some space. A single dark eye shrouded with purple bangs, peeks out from the slight gap between the door.

“You guys...are such dorks,” Virgil says, his voice trembling just a bit, and then the door swings open. 

Patton is up in an instant, letting out a cry as he surges forward to pull Virgil into a crushing hug; ignoring Logan's slightly hesitant protests behind him. Roman can barely see Virgil through Patton's embrace, but he can make out how red and puffy his eyes are. How his makeup was smudged all over the cheeks, most likely from being constantly rubbed to wipe tears away. Besides that Virgil looked perfectly fine. 

_Thank goodness._

Virgil carefully wraps his arms around the sobbing Patton and then tucks his chin over his shoulder. He glances over at Logan who just shakes his head with a smirk, and then his eyes land on Roman still sitting on the floor.

“Are we cool?” Roman asks hopefully.

Virgil gives him a small smile and whispers, “Yeah, dude. We're cool.”

With a sigh of relief, Roman beams.

**Author's Note:**

> Depression episodes always send me into a horrible writer's block. I needed to try and shake it off before I attempted to work on my bigger stories so uh, hopefully it turned out alright?
> 
> **Tumblr:** [@PrinceofDespair](https://princeofdespair.tumblr.com/)


End file.
